Adoption, God’s Work

Yesterday Cindie mentioned to me her thinking that our involvement in the process of adopting two teenage girls from Ukraine was a spiritual one. I have suspected as much myself and since our recent conversation I've reflected more deeply on this truth.

I have heard it said that the orphans are sometimes told that they should be good so that someone will want to adopt them. The thinking is that the “bad” kids shouldn’t be adopted. It has been said this past spring by some that Maria wasn’t ready to be adopted that her behavior wasn’t “good enough” to get a family yet.

I personally don’t agree with this kind of thinking. I grew up in a church environment that did the same kind of thing, tied God’s behavior and it’s consequences directly to peoples behavior and it's consequences. Often these inferences are valid, many times they are not, they end up being just plain manipulative.

What about being good and being adopted? In a perfect world, all children deserve adoption whether they are good or bad. But let’s face it, humans are doing the adopting, and we aren’t perfect, and good boys and girls are more attractive and are more likely to be adopted. So, it is true that you should be good so that someone will want to adopt you. But this is a truth about life in general. You should be good so that someone will want to marry you, or be your roommate, or carpool with you, or give you a job or, you get the idea.

I take exception to the idea that “bad” kids should not be adopted. That a person might not be “good enough” to get a family, that adoption is something that a child must earn. Perhaps there is the thinking that you don’t want the bad ones to ruin it for the rest by spoiling the willing prospective parents who end up being “burned.” But I’m challenged by the concept.

What does God say about adoption? Actually quite a lot. It seems that adoption is a central theme in God’s great plan for the universe. Check out Ephesians.

”Long ago, even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. His unchanging plan has always been to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. And this gave him great pleasure.”

It seems we don’t earn our adoption into God’s family. He chose us before he even made the world. And it is a good thing because who could ever be good enough to earn adoption into God’s family?

Adoption is about being chosen. We choose whom we adopt. We choose no matter what, by God’s grace. Our girls have been chosen and they don’t even know it yet. Just like we were chosen by God before time before we knew it.

Cindie is right, it is very spiritual this adoption stuff. It is God’s work, through and through.